Iowa City Hospital Stay #3 - COVID - October 5-12

Monday late afternoon I was moved to the COVID floor of the hospital. Not exactly where I expected to be (OK, honestly, the last place I expected to be), coming back to the hospital this time around, but here I am!!

And I do not have any idea how long I will be here. One doctor talked about a week, plus or minus. At least I have a private room here, though the view (another building) left a lot to be desired.

Originally, we were told that Denise was unable to visit me in the COVID unit. Later we learned that it was possible for her to visit me for one hour a day, but because she and her Dad had some COVID symptoms, we opted for her to stay home.

I really felt lousy, especially the first day. I woke up Monday night just after 1 PM completely drenched. My fever broke, so I called the Nursing Assistant and asked for clean bedding. While I was at it, I gave myself a sponge bath. And that was the last of my fever. Thankfully. Over the next few days I continued to improve and started feeling much better.

The nurses in the Hematology unit are the best, and the ones outside the Hematology unit have been great, but every once in a while, I get one that is extra special. Monday night I had such a nurse. We talked a lot and I shared about our ministry in Ukraine. On Tuesday night, she was not my nurse, but she made a point to come into my room to give me a gift - a leather-bound copy of the book "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young. She told me how much she had enjoyed it, and that she felt led to give it to me, hoping that it was not inappropriate to do so. I was very surprised, and thanked her for her thoughtfulness. I told her that I know many others who have enjoyed this devotional (including my Dad on his cancer journey), though so far I myself had not read it. She had bookmarked and pointed out the devotional for January 15 as one that really spoke to her and thought it might do the same for me. It did. Here it is:

MY FACE IS SHINING UPON YOU, beaming out Peace that transcends understanding. You are surrounded by a sea of problems, but you are face-to-Face with Me, your Peace. As long as you focus on Me, you are safe. If you gaze too long at the myriad problems around you, you will sink under the weight of your burdens. When you start to sink, simply call out, “Help me, Jesus!” and I will lift you up.

The closer you live to Me, the safer you are. Circumstances around you are undulating, and there are treacherous-looking waves in the distance. Fix your eyes on Me, the One who never changes. By the time those waves reach you, they will have shrunk to proportions of My design. I am always beside you, helping you face today’s waves. The future is a phantom, seeking to spook you. Laugh at the future! Stay close to Me.

PHILIPPIANS 4:7; MATTHEW 14:30; HEBREWS 12:2

So far the devotionals that I have read have been super thought-provoking and several have touched me right where I am at. I am thankful how God regularly reminds us that He is the "God who sees me".

Late the evening of the 7th, we learned that our dear friend, Vi Washena, had passed away and was now with the Lord, whom she loved so much and had served so faithfully. Oh, how she will be missed. She and her first husband, Bill, befriended us after we moved to Owatonna MN in 1996. We spent a lot of time with them, spending lots of time playing games around the table. They were so good to us. When I turned 33 in 1997, Bill was 66, and he told me that I was in the prime of life. For some reason, still unknown to me, that was a very tough period of life for me. And I thought, if this is the best there is, then please put me out of my misery now. (Of course, I really did not mean it, but you understand that I could not see possibly how it was the prime of life.) Thankfully, my life did get a lot better, so I must have just hit my prime a bit later in life!  (Perhaps in my 50s?)

He died January 1, 2000 (the famous Y2K) and we greatly missed him. After that, Vi really became part of our family. We went to church together (driving 15 miles one way) and became very close. And she always spent January 1st with us because we did not want her to be alone that day. God took care of her as He was preparing us to become missionaries, and surprised her by bringing a new husband, Menke, into her life. Since his passing last December, Vi grew tired of the fight and longed to just be with Jesus. We are so happy for her, now worshiping at the feet of Jesus, but we cried tears of personal loss together even before she passed away. The world needs more people like her, who love God and love people!

Thursday morning I was sitting at a table using my computer when the doctors came in. They were encouraged to see me up and looking so good. That was helpful to me, because I really did not have any idea whether how I felt translated into how I looked.

My doctors wisely decided to postpone my second round of chemo to give me a chance to gain more strength following my COVID experience. It should have been the 15th of October, but they pushed it back to the 22nd. How thankful I was for thir wisdom.

I was blessed with the same night nurse four nights in a row, and her last two nights, Thursday and Friday, she was super sweet and left me alone to sleep for 6-7 hours. What a nice treat that was, especially after not sleeping much earlier in the week. They did have to give me a stronger sleeping pill to counteract the steroids, but putting it all together, I was able to rest. Usually the Nursing Assistant is in the room every 4 hours or so to check vitals (around midnight and 4 AM), but my nurse took care of vitals between 10:30 and 11:00 PM, and then again after 5 AM. And I thanked her profusely.

On Thursday, Denise's Dad took a COVID test because his symptoms were the worst. (As it turned out, we had to wait until the following Tuesday to learn that he tested positive, and by then he was feeling better). That means Denise most likely had it as well, though also a very light case. Only her Mom showed no symptoms. And it is very difficult to quarantine an entire family!

On Friday evening, before I went to sleep, I read a couple of the devotionals out of the book I had received earlier in the week. Bingo. Just what I have been preaching in Ukraine this year. (I am not planning to share a lot of these devotionals, just happened that way.) As soon as I read the first line, I laughed out loud. This one is from January 26:

GIVE UP THE ILLUSION that you deserve a problem-free life. Part of you is still hungering for the resolution of all difficulties. This is a false hope! As I told My disciples, in the world you will have trouble. Link your hope not to problem solving in this life but to the promise of an eternity of problem-free life in heaven. Instead of seeking perfection in this fallen world, pour your energy into seeking Me: the Perfect One.

It is possible to enjoy Me and glorify Me in the midst of adverse circumstances. In fact, My Light shines most brightly through believers who trust Me in the dark. That kind of trust is supernatural: a production of My indwelling Spirit. When things seem all wrong, trust Me anyway. I am much less interested in right circumstances than in right responses to whatever comes your way.

JOHN 16:33; PSALM 112:4, 7

It is possible to enjoy Me and glorify Me in the midst of adverse circumstances. James wrote that the trying of our faith produces endurance. And why do we need endurance? It is because we want to give up before we should. God wants to bring us to the end of ourselves so that He can make us more like Jesus. Is it easy? NO way! Is it worth it? Absolutely!

Thinking back to a conversation I had the other day with a close friend from Ukraine makes this even more interesting. He told how much he misses me (which I really miss being with my guys there, too!). Then he said - "Now I'm 100% sure you're not weak". What a compliment! The strength of God is coming through my life, because I do not have much of my own strength right now.

I was so excited on the 10th to step on the scale and learn that I had dropped 25 pounds of fluid. And that meant a lot of trips to the bathroom - morning, afternoon, and night!

On Sunday evening I had a very hard time going to sleep between the steroids of the morning and the excitement of going home. When I did sleep, it was only for about four hours. As I lay awake at 5 am, I realized that today was the 12th of October, exactly two months since my birthday and hospital visit in Krivoy Rog. What a lot had transpired in that time, and my loving heavenly Father planned it all. (My mom used to sing a song with that as the theme).

That day I read my Bible much earlier in the morning than is normal for me. Proverbs 12:3 (NLT) says, "Wickedness never brings stability, but the godly have deep roots." I thank God for my godly heritage and the privilege that I have had of serving God since I was 5. It is only His grace in my life that has held me and helped me grow in Him. I am trying to teach my guys in Ukraine that we can withstand the storms of life only when we have deep roots in God. And we only develop those roots by spending daily time with God - reading the Bible and praying. Is it a battle? Of course! Anything worth doing requires discipline and sacrifice - sports, music, academics, and most of all, following Christ!

The very next verse begins, "A worthy wife is a crown for her husband." I just want to say thank you to my wife for being a rock during this time. Yes, she has had and will have her moments. Anyone who has been in her shoes will tell you that it is difficult seeing your husband so weak. And yet, she is a worthy wife because she knows the Source of her help and strength. Thank you, honey, for taking such good care of me, even when I was not the kindest and best patient. I love you and am so grateful for you! 

This morning I have had a song going through my head, and it is an old one. It seems that I was actually born 50 years past my musical preference or style. When I was a teen, I did not listen to rock music (not even Christian rock). I loved to turn on the phonograph player with my favorite artist, Tony Fontane, and listen to his tenor voice and the piano accompaniment behind him.

The song this morning, "His Eye is on the Sparrow" reminds me that God sees me, just like He saw Hagar so many years ago. My favorite artist singing this song is Ethel Waters - and I found a video of her singing this at a Billy Graham Crusade in 1975. I hope you enjoy it, as I have so many times. (Click here to go to the YouTube video that I downloaded and edited here instead of watching this "little" video.)

Getting to go home after a week is exciting, but I am also a little nervous about it, given my track record of my two other attempts at staying home. But this time I feel better than I did before and my body is on the upswing, so hopefully I will be able to just rest, rejuvenate, and recover for round 2 of chemo.

They wanted to know my weight again that morning, and I had dropped another 18 pounds of fluid. This put my weight  at 182, just 10 pounds over my weight in July. And it was obvious that the lymph nodes were returning to normal and that my swelling was going down. When I took a shower before leaving the hospital that day, it was the first time that I was able to do so standing up, without sitting on a bench, since the morning we left Ukraine (and if I could have, I would have used a bench that day too).

Leaving the COVID unit was a whole new experience. There is a special exit just for COVID patients. Denise needed to be in place before they called an escort for me. Then we waited more than 30 minutes for my escort, who brought me to where my wife was waiting for me. It was hard to believe that we had been apart for one whole week. And how good to be back together once again!